The pirate replies, we were in a storm at sea, and i was swept overboard into a school of sharks. A sailor meets a pirate in a bar, and they take turns telling about their adventures on the seas. The sailor pointed to the pirate s eye patch and asked, how did you get that. You may be the dirty son of a biscuit eater, but at least with a few pirate jokes in ye, youll at least have a sense of humor. Pirates did not wear eye patches because they were missing eyes or for medical reasons, they wore them while boarding a ship so when they went belo. Arrrrgh, ye scallywag this be thee place for rude pirate jokes. To get an article, image or subcategory to show up here, append category. What did the pirate say when his wooden leg got stuck in the freezer.
The pirate said, aye, i wrestled a shark and lost me leg. On a pirate ship out on the high seas, the first mate was up in the crows nest looking out for danger. I was a attacked by another pirate and the bastard cut off me hand said the pirate. To the amazement of the castaways, a genie came forth. We have so many pirate jokes, weve had to add a second page. Oh, one day we were at sea and a flock of birds flew over. If ye cant take thee heat then get out of thee galley, ye galleywag. Funny cartoons, funny jokes, hilarious, eye jokes, optometry humor, comics kingdom, eye doctor, medical humor, jokes. A pirate ship comes ashore for a night at a mysterious island between arabia and india. A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, hey, i havent seen you in a while. He had a wooden leg, a hook where his right hand should be and a patch over his right eye. Jun 16, 2012 how much did the pirate pay for his peg leg and hook. Pirates did not wear eye patches because they were missing eyes or for medical reasons, they wore them while boarding a ship so when they went below deck, they could flip the patch up and have an eye accustomed to the dark. If this be not what ye looking for then leave now or suffer thee consequences.
Pirate jokes one liners gags humor pirate treasure. Like the other pick up lines, the best time to use these is when you are actually dressed up like a pirate, or if you are attending a pirate related event like pirate show, or talk like a pirate day. While rummaging through the boats provisions, the pirate stumbled across an old lamp. Click on printables and print out the eye patch pattern on white card stock and cut out. He hasnt seen him in a while and has suffered three injuries since they last met.
The bartender notices the pirates pegleg, eyepatch and hook for a hand. The irs decides to audit grandpa, and summons him to the irs office. More recent medical texts have often referred to the eye patch as a pirate s patch and writing in the minnesota academy of sciences journal in 1934, charles sheard of the mayo foundation, pointed out that by wearing a patch the pirate s patch over one eye, it will keep the covered eye in a state of readiness and adaptation for night vision. Pirate s insurance after many years at sea, a pirate decided to retire. Well, says the pirate, we were in another battle and we boarded the enemy ship. The seaman notes that the pirate has a pegleg, a hook, and an eye patch. This is the best collection of pirate jokes anywhere. The bartender looks at him and says my god man, what happened to you. If youre looking for funny pirate jokes for kids, then drop anchor and get going with this collection of pirate puns, knockknock jokes, pirate riddles and more. Pirates frequently had to move above and below decks, from daylight to near darkness, and sheedy says the smart ones wore a patch over one eye to keep it darkadapted outside.
After spending a few hours at the dock, he sees a man who has a peg leg, a hook hand, and an eye patch. Uploaded 12042008 this sailor met a pirate in a bar, and the sailor couldnt help but notice that the pirate was pretty badly the worse for wear. The pirate said, aye, a bird came by and left droppings in me eye. A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, hey, i havent seen you in a while. We did our best to bring you only the best jokes about pirates. When his mate walks in they greet each other and he notices the pirates injuries. Aye, says the pirate, we were in another battle and we boarded the enemy ship. Funny jokes a pirate with a peg leg, a hook and an eye. Sol has a patch over one eye, a hook for a hand, and a wooden peg leg. I was in a sword fight and my hand was cut off but the surgeon fixed me up with this hook, and i feel great, really. Johnny replies, cool and what happened with your hand. Originally published in readers digest popular videos.
I think id start talking like a pirate at least 50% of the time for a while until the novelty wore off. Funny jokesone eyed pirate a pirate was talking to a landlubber in a bar. Pirate jokes are a way to lighten the mood of any land lubber. The pirate has a wooden pegleg, a hook for a hand, and patch over his eye. The pirate replies, i was swept overboard into a school of sharks. So, the sailor asked the pirate how he got the peg leg, and the pirate answered, well mate, i got washed up overboard one night while we were in a fierce storm.
The bartender and the pirate start talking and the bartender casually slips in the question of how the pirate lost his leg. Sep 04, 20 pirates frequently had to move above and below decks, from daylight to near darkness, and sheedy says the smart ones wore a patch over one eye to keep it darkadapted outside. A collection of eye patch jokes and eye patch puns. When is the best time for a pirate to buy a new ship. Weve collected the best of eye patch jokes and puns just for you. Oct 30, 2014 click on printables and print out the eye patch pattern on white card stock and cut out. Suddenly, a huge wave came from nowhere and slapped the side of the ship so hard it rocked back and forth.
Ended up it wasnt an original, it was a pirate copy. Howad you end up with a really funny clean jokes and humor. A little boy walks up and says, are you a real pirate. Pirate jokes pirate humor for scurvy sea dogs, arr matey. The pirate said angrily it was after i got me hook. Pirates, stereotypically talk with an accent and begin sentences with an arrr. A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and talk turns to their adventures on the sea. It shouldnt be necessary to manually add categories to pages created using the infobox templates. The act of shooting ejaculate into a girls eye and simultaneously kicking her in the shin, causing her to hop about on one leg saying arrr or another expression of pain. A pirate and his parrot, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a valiant battle. If yer kids arrr fans of these pirate jokes, try teaching em these other clean, kidfriendly jokes thatll get the whole family laughing.
Pirates frequently had to move above and below decks, from daylight to near darkness, and sheedy says the smart ones wore a patch over one. Pirate jokes pirate names pirate party pirate phrases pirate sayings pirate ships pirate songs. The bartender says, excuse me, sir, but do you know you have a ships wheel down the front of your pants. The sailor asks so, how did you end up with the pegleg. The landlubber noticed that, like any selfrespecting pirate, this guy had a peg leg, a hook in place of one of his hands, and a. Since he had suffered injuries on the job and after a little budgeting, he thought that he should collect on his workers compensation insurance. I have had to wear an eye patch in the past for a month or so. Measure enough elastic to fit comfortably around each childs head. The eyes adapt quickly when going from darkness to light, studies have shown that it can take up to 25 minutes for them read more. In celebration of talk like a pirate day on the 19th september, we have compiled a list of our favourite pirate jokes that for you to share with your friends on this bootyful day.
Mar 16, 2020 blackbeards favorite collection of pirate jokes. The auditor said, well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no fulltime employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. This sailor met a pirate in a bar, and the sailor couldnt help but notice that the pirate was pretty badly the worse for wear. The first mate quickly retrieved the captains red shirt, and while wearing the brightly colored frock, the captain led his crew into battle and defeated the mighty pirates. The lamp is dirty, so he rubbs it clean, and a great genie comes out, granting him any three wishes he wants. The sailor pointed to the pirates eye patch and asked, how did you get that. Oct 25, 2016 funny jokes a pirate with a peg leg, a hook and an eye patch walks into a bar. Pirates insurance after many years at sea, a pirate decided to retire. The pirate replies, we were in a storm at sea, and i.
Pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his crotch. So, avast ye mateys of all the pirate jokes we have on this page. Pirate jokesreferences directed towards someone wearing. The sailor pointed to the pirate s hook and asked, how did you get that. But the surgeon fixed me up with this hook, and i be feeling great, really. A man decides to quit his job and run away to join a pirate crew. If the patch was only temporary id do the pirate gag for the whole time i had to wear it. If i had to wear an eye patch you couldnt stop me from making pirate jokes.
Little johnny meets a pirate with a wooden leg, a hook, and an eye patch. I dont remember a lot of pirate jokes, but i am sure they were there. A pirate walks into a bar, with a wooden leg, a hook on his arm and an eye patch. Funny jokes a pirate with a peg leg, a hook and an eye patch walks into a bar. We have compiled a list of funny pirate themed pick up lines for you to use. Rude pirate jokes funny humor that will make ye scrub the. The first mate ends up in a bar sitting at a table with an oil lamp on it. A pirate walks into a bar with a big ships wheel down his pants. The man promptly joins the captains crew and they ship out to sea that very day. The sailor notes that the pirate has a pegleg, a hook and an eye patch. Oct 03, 2019 i have had to wear an eye patch in the past for a month or so. Most people think its the rrrrr, but really its the c they love. Some walk with a peg leg, and some have a hook in place of a missing hand while others may long beards and wear an eye patch. Pirate jokes that are so funny you arrrrr sure to laugh at them.
So, the sailor asked the pirate how he got the peg leg, and the pirate answered, well mate, i got washed up overboard one night while we. The sailor pointed to the pirates hook and asked, how did you get that. Check out these corny jokes, plus learn why we celebrate funny holidays like talk like a pirate day in the first place. The auditor was not surprised when grandpa showed up with his attorney. Two pirates were talking, the second one with a pegleg, a hook, and an eyepatch. Anfun black eye patch with adjustable buckle for adults and kids soft and comfortable pirate eye patch single eye mask for amblyopia lazy eye 4. Alphatool 12 pcs skull print pirate hat eye patches set, 6 pieces caribbean pirate captain hat and 6 pieces black pirate eye mask for pirate party, cosplay, dress up theme party, halloween 4. Eye patch, leather eye patch, eye care, pirate eye patch cosplay, blindfold, eyepatch, metal gear solid v. Secretly hoping that a genie would appear, he rubbed the lamp vigorously. The fact that some pirates wore eye patches most likely had nothing to do with a missing eye, and everything to do with being able to seespecifically, above decks and below them.
Well, says the pirate, one day when we were at sea. How much did the pirate pay for his peg leg and hook. Apr 21, 2014 a pirate and his parrot, were adrift in a lifeboat following a dramatic escape from a valiant battle. If you know of any puns about pirates that were missing, please let us know in the. The seaman asks, so, how did you end up with the pegleg. Every pirate joke in existance can be found here, you barnaclebitten land lubber. Oct 03, 2019 if i had to wear an eye patch you couldnt stop me from making pirate jokes.
We were in a storm at sea, and i were swept overboard headed for davy jones. Pirate jokesreferences directed towards someone wearing an. The pirate answers, another pirate chopped it off in a sword fight. The pirate replies, aaargh, its driving me nuts long ago, when sailing ships ruled the waves, a captain and his crew were in danger of being boarded by a. One day, while sailing the seven seas, his lookout spotted a pirate ship approaching, and the crew became frantic. Yes, ye varmint, even you may learn to tell bona fide pirate jokes just like the seadogs of old. Some assume pirates wore eye patches to cover a missing eye or an eye that was wounded in battle, but in fact, an eye patch was more likely to be used to condition the eye so the pirate could fight in the dark. More recent medical texts have often referred to the eye patch as a pirates patch and writing in the minnesota academy of sciences journal in 1934, charles sheard of the mayo foundation, pointed out that by wearing a patch the pirates patch over one eye, it will keep the covered eye in a state of readiness and adaptation for night vision. Top ten pirate jokes for kids the day i became a pirate. How could you lose an eye by a bird shitting in it.
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